There isn’t enough sleep for depression. “Ken W.”

I’m trying to cash in on some of this horror
— Adam, $DJIA at 7,582
  • Ken: I think my next promotion will be awarded posthumously.
  • Nancee: Yeah, your bonus check will come with a toe tag.
What, did you steal those off a homeless guy?
— Adam, referring to Ken’s dilapidated shoes
This’ll be a doozy, so bring a cup.
— Adam, on meeting with senior management
You can’t stab me through a phone.
— Joe, worried about his constructive feeback
“I don’t want to call these guys liars, because if you parse their language, what they say may be technically true.  But if you put the whole picture together, the whole thing is bullshit.” 

—Charlie Gasparino, invoking Bravo Sierra to make a point about the banking heads

“I don’t want to call these guys liars, because if you parse their language, what they say may be technically true. But if you put the whole picture together, the whole thing is bullshit.”

Charlie Gasparino, invoking Bravo Sierra to make a point about the banking heads


It’s like the difference between a bruise and internal bleeding.
— Adam, explaining the difference between a minor and major issue
Our retention strategy is that no one else is hiring.
— Adam, during our staff meeting
If you’re so eager to have your review, we can do it during your exit interview.
— Adam
If he dumps you, I’ll be sloppy seconds.
— Ken, looking for a lunch date
Nice suit, does that come with a backhand?
— Adam, regarding a certain CNBC analyst’s sartorial disaster

Those aren’t pillows…

Ned Ryerson?!

8 is the new 50